Saturday, 2 November 2013

A surf trip to Devon

Chasing the 17sec period swell

I went to pick Stallion up at Wimbledon at 7:00. We left promptly and met BBJ in his orange van. After strapping his board quite quickly to the car, we made good progress and arrived at North Devon prompto.

On arrival we drove past Saunton, which looked pretty poor, then Croyde. We checked this in some detail- it was pretty windy and chunky, with some fun looking air drops but otherwise rather a lot of water. The consensus was to check Poohland round the corner. We got to the top of the cliff and sure enough it looked cleanish although not special. After checking the freeparking situation there was no choice but to pay the astronomical parking. I wil have a quick rant now about parking- after spending the last 4 weeks in France/Spain, where car parks are FREE, paved, right by the beach and have showers we were paying £6 to park in a muddy field. A 5 year old boy was on duty at the car park which Stallion jibed at the use of child labour.

After getting changed we headed down. Having spent a chunk of time in SW France last month I was always setting myself up for disappointment, but I didn't realise quite how crap it would be. In fact it was terrible. Poohland was doing that thing before high tide where it goes to break, backs off, then closes out. I should have booked the flight to Lisbon a week earlier. The 17 secs not sure where that came from, I have seen better wave periods in a bath tub. I felt slightly dejected, got out meeting BBJ on the way. He also agreed it was terrible. Back at the car we continued to slag off the surf. Half an hour later Stallion came out, he agreed it was crap. We continued to talk about the rubbish surf and a milf bodyboarder with the van next door. BBJ fetched some warm drinks. We talked about a second session being mandatory.

We made the decision and put on the wet, cold wetsuits. Fortunately I had a thermo rash vest dry, which made it that much more bearable. BBJ was the only hoodless out of the crew. I miss 30 degree Hoss big time. Actually this session was awesome. Cleaned up nicely- and was out until dark when the crowds dropped off and the waves were cleanish (although no Croyde by anymeans).

Stoked we headed to Ilfracombe and Ocean Backpackers. Myself and BBJ checked in. As part of the negotiation tactics we chatted with the Canadian girl (with some interesting body tattoos) on the desk explaining that I had been a few times in winter. In particular, a time when in January in the snow, I stayed there and remembered a guy dressed as a woman. Instead of getting funny looks she said 'yes that is Dave- he is a transvestite- he has been living here on and off for 3 years'. BBJ was clearly getting excitied. Anyway this is all relevant because we managed to swing her for the private room at the same price as the dorm room saving us from the Uni Surf clubs. Having a private bath was great was we could fill up and chuck all the suits in. BBJ fancied the double bed- so I passed over driver's rights in exchange for 2 beers. I think I got a good deal as the bed collapsed- prompting the Canadian girl to come back. She told us a few stories from her time in the hostel including when she walked in on a gay orgy in a bathroom, with custard on the floor. BBJ was interested in this story.

The crew headed out for some well deserved fish and chips next door- they were ok, but no Scarborough North Bay fisheries. Following this we headed to the pub for the pool tournament- and plenty of pints, the Doombars on BBJ went down a treat. I was the singles champion, but BBJ was doubles king including an amazing double pocket shot which left the Stallion stunned. There were plenty of spooning jokes. It was time to hit the town. Headed to Buddy's- o yes what a venue. The music was all from my teenage days- Green Day, SUM 41, Blink 182 and a played request for Stacey's Mum- SICK. We were approached by a guy with his trousers round his knees, he looked a bit like Gollum from Lord of the rings- he was rather friendly in fact he kept wanting to high five us (bizarrre). Buddy's was an experience, but the night was young. A quick game of fussball at DJ's sports bar, where the Stallion was the stallion and we headed to the 'CLUB'- and what a club it was complete with a pretty much empty dance floor. We watched some locals pole dance, we even had a shot at it ourselves. Bill was getting rounds of cocktails (no puns here)- which were like something from a Uranium enrichment process.

The night was still young so we headed to 'Munchies' the Kebab shop. The blokes who ran it were solid and we ate much junk. Stallion enquired as to why they needed a bouncer- this was soon answered. There was a guy and 2 girls- one was his sister and/or girlfriend something like that. They proceed to throw fried chicken around (classy)- even funnier was that they were older than me.

We called it a night and headed back- but this was not all. A local guy, with lots tattoos, came and slapped BBJ on the backside. Further down the hill we saw a man in the middle of the road taking a dump in a flower pot- classy.

This morning we woke up slightly rough from the uranium cocktails. After a banana run we headed to Woolie. Although windy it was, kind of cross offshore, we made a call to get in. Unfortunately while getting changed the wind was switching. In fact by the time we were changed it was terrible. So picture this 3-4ft slop, howling cross shore, hungover, a sewage alert, wet wetsuits and horizontal rain- welcome back to surfing in the UK. It was pretty much a foam party out the back- a couple of sections and I called it a day. Meanwhile BBJ came out stoked with a great ride. Horses for courses. It looked horrendous out there now- so we got changed


Post changed we headed to a Cafe where most of this report was written- that is how good the surf was. The wind was horrendous- infact the flag pole was bending.

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